Wednesday, May 11, 2011
There are times when being a mother is hard, and I think what did I get my self into. I always wonder if I am doing, or saying the right thing, so that I, with Randan, and Heavenly Fathers help can raise a valiant, honorable son of are father in heavens. I was scared to death to have kids. I always wanted them very much, I just had to get over the hurtle of nine months of doctors visits and possibly coming in contact with needles. Oh ya, and lets not forget the actual delivery, and all that goes along with it. I am terrified when it comes to doctors, needles, and hospitals. The smell can even do me in. I didn't realize that I need to be a little more worried about the part after that. The responsibility it takes. I want to do it perfectly. I thought I was prepared, but when I got home my maternal instinct's kicked in, and I started to see where I wasn't prepared at all. The baby blues hit, and wow was I in for it. I don't think that it helped that I had tucker in January when there is no sun. The next three to four weeks after having Tucker was total fog cover, and that is never good for me. Another hurtle was: Tucker was only two and half weeks old, and my dad passed away. Wow was that a blow, so sudden, and unexpected. I hope that you can get how much I love being a mom by me saying simply, "I ADORE BEING A MOM." That my ranting doesn't drowned that out, because that is the main purpose for this entry. Me saying, "I love being a mother."